Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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