you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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