that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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