if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize