i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
youre lurking in front of me
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Randomize