Dual....:-)
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
