we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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