I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
