I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
