The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
