I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Life is so much better after having sex.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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