i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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