I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
