this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize