Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
