He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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