Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
