I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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