I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
