You're so nebulous sometimes
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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