If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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