You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
