dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
This girl is more easily done than said...
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
