I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Randomize
