Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
