didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
