Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
