after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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