Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
