It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
