I'm drive I can fine osifer
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
