We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
