"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Randomize