i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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