Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
In America we eat man semen.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
