Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize