is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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