North Korea, Best Korea!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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