used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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