why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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