yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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