I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
