Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
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