It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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