(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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