apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize