I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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