Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize