I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
