Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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