seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
