i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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